only 5 more months to graduation.

I'm so sick of school and everyone in it. I am way to much of a push over & that is not what I want to be. I'm tired of worrying if someone is going to get mad at me or if I'm not going to ever have any friends. i need to get out.
I don't want to look back on my life & regret anything. I think i'm just going to start not caring & let whatever happens happen. What's going on in high school right now will not matter even 2 years from now, so why worry about it right now? true friends will stay with you no matter what and all the pieces that need to fall together will. So that's what I'm going to work on... myself. I'm going to focus on me and what is right for me. 
I find out if I am accepted to Francis Marion tomorrow & I talked on the phone to my admissions counselor from Columbia College today for like 20 minutes, not about school, she was just seeing how everything was & that made me feel good. She actually cares about what's going on in my life and she doesn't look at me as just another application. 
<3

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let go. Things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when their right. You believe lies so that you will eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, & sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together" 

its taken me this long, baby, but i figured you out.

well, Thanksgiving is over & school starts back tomorrow :(
I'm not looking forward to that at all.
I don't know what has been wrong with me lately, sometimes i just get mad or annoyed & i wanna be left alone. I don't know why, nobody is upsetting me. i don't whats wrong, oh well.
so this weekend i realized that i'm over it. That waiting for you and even being friends with you isn't worth it anymore. i could be missing out on something good because of you. i'm not gonna think about you anymore.
haha i hope that wasn't dramatic, but there are just some things that are good to realize earlier than later.
i got my SAT scores back, i didn't do too bad. i think i have figured out what schools i would like to apply for: Winthrop, Columbia, Francis Marion, and Newberry. I wish i was brave enough to go to like university of southern california or something but i'd never make it that far away haha.
I can't believe i missed like an entire week of this but i'm sure i'll be back to normal since school starts tomorrow, i'm going to go and actually do something productive.


oh, i'm not much of emotional person at all, and i don't cry a lot, but today i saw this old couple with their dog walking down the road with a wagon full of bags, and my heart sank for them. i want to save the world.




"keep your head up, your gonna make it, i promise, just keep ya head up."

I am thankful.

Today was good, I'm starting to feel a lot better.
I'm so glad that we have break from school!
i've been thinking a lot about my future lately. i have a lot of decisions to make. 
COME ON MAY 28!






"It isn't what you have in your pocket that makes you thankful, but what you have in your heart."

I don't feel to good & I'm in a Dr. Seuss mood.

"All Alone! Whether you like it or not, Alone will be something you’ll be quite a lot. And when you’re alone, there’s a very good chance you’ll meet things that scare you right out of your pants. There are some, down the road between hither and yon, that can scare you so much you won’t want to go on. But on you will go though the weather be foul. On you will go though your enemies prowl. On you will go though the Hakken-Kraks howl. Onward up many a frightening creek, though your arms may get sore and your sneakers may leak. On and on you will hike. And I know you’ll hike far and face up to your problems whatever they are."

another good dayyyy

So I just got home from Brixx, I'm pretty tired, but I'm going to finish my homework tonight.
I'm so glad tomorrow is Friday. I don't really have anything to blog about tonight. Today was just ordinary.
Hopefully tomorrow will be more exciting. <3


I use to love this movie <3 

"Darlin, forever is a long, long time, and time has a way of changing things" - Fox and the Hound.

yahhhh.

So tonight I work at IGA so I know I will be to tired to blog when I get home because I get off at 10.

Today has been pretty good, I guess it's what you make out of your day is what counts, even if you are having a bad day.

Only 5 more weeks until this semester is over, THANK GOODNESS.

Next semester is going to be so easy & probably a lot more stress free.

life is good <3

Here's something for you to think about, you don't have to like people, and for the people you don't like you should just ignore that they exist. life is to short to be worrying about someone that wont matter a year from now. Mrs. Avery once gave me good advice and said "stop worrying about those who don't like you and focus on the people that do." I've learned a lot this year & i grew up a lot.... try it.  

QUOTE:

"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up."

iloveyou<3 -ash *garbb* 

Life is good.

Today was awesomeee.
Dad went & bought me some stuff for my car :)
I really have nothing to complain about, i mean, i would like for school to hurry up a little bit, but its whatever.

It feels so good to have clean, straight teeth <3


QUOTE:
"Here we go again, I kinda wanna be more than friends"

best monday everrrr.

I get my braces off & get a new car! Today was the best day I have had in a while. Its got me motivated :)
I just need to get that gingivectomy to make my gums straight & then my mouth will be perfecttttt.
& for those of you who are wandering what it is: A gingivectomy is a periodontal surgical procedure which includes the removal of gingival tissue in order to achieve a more aesthetic appearance and/or functional contour. Gingivectomies are frequently performed using electrosurgery to cauterize away the undesired gum tissue.
Pretty much they are just going to even my gums up.

QUOTE:
"when you've hit rockbottom at least the only way you have to go is up"

I'm Me.

Today I realized that I just don't care anymore.
I don't want to look back 10 years from now & regret anything.
I want to be able to look back and be proud of myself as a teenager, and so far, I think I'm doing a great job. 
I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I can't wait for tomorrow.
& I can't wait for college.






QUOTE:
"10 years from now, it won't matter what jeans you wore, how popular you were, what your hair looked like, or what sneakers you wore. What will matter is what you made of your education, and where it took you in life." 

6 months to graduation.

So today was pretty good. We woke up in the morning and went to look at a car. I LOVE IT. We're going to go back monday & hopefully get it, i'm praying that we do! It's a Nissan Sentra. It's perfect & i really need a car, so i hope it works out :)
I'm really tired & I think I'm going to go ahead and finish all my homework tonight so I don't have to worry about it on Sunday.
<3


"You don't have to feel like a waste of space. Your original, cannot be replaced."

title.

i'm sooooooo happy that it is the weekend! 
ash is over right now for our anual sleepovers on friday nights.
i have nothing interesting to say, so i think i'm just going to leave it at that.


quote of the dayyyyy!
"Sometimes the cards we are dealt are not always fair. However you must keep smiling & moving on"

things are never bad as they seem.

I don't see how people look back & think "oh i wish i was in high school again". There is no way i would ever want to go back to being a teenager or relive my senior year in high school. I'm ready for college & i'm ready to get away from everyone. 
I've been doing my "student teacher" for teacher cadet for the past week. i love my third grade class! everyone is so great, i cant wait to become a real teacher :)


well, i'm done hear.
i kinda wanna start doing something fun, so i think i'm going to have a quote of the day:


"Your braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think"
                             -Winnie The Pooh.

if you cant hold on, let go.

you belong with me;

many people are going to read that post & automatically think of the one person i would never even want to look at again.
i'm talking about someone i officially met over the summer, even though i knew about him during school the past two years. I had my chance with him & then kinda blew it. big mistake. I was so caught up in what i thought i wanted i just kinda blew him off & he moved on. I realized that i would never go back to what i had & i should've taken the chance when i had it.
too bad the past two years of my life has big one big waste, i wish i could take that back too... but thanks, you helped me realize how much i never want someone like you again. 






but on a happier note.... :)


the past few days have been really good, last sunday i went muddin for the first time with caleb! i even went up a staircase called "hell" or something.
it was really scary but i really liked itt. hopefully i will get to do it again soon.






I'm ready for college & most importantly, GRADUATION!

you gotta take the rain before the rainbow.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR DITCHING ME TONIGHT....
because i had a great time with the people i went with instead :)


today was an awful day, altogether, and after school i didn't think it would get better, but it did.
i cant wait for the weekend.


except i am taking the SAT & i'm kinda nervous.
butttttttt its okay.
I filled out a guidance gram today because school is just unbearable & i'm ready to get out as fast as i can.


oh, i cant believe that i forgot to say this, but i had the opportunity to change someone life tonight, or really save their life, i hope what i said worked & i hope he takes my advice because even if nobody else cares about him i care if he lives or dies. i need to talk to a guidance counselor though, because suicide is serious.
something i have always wanted to do was make a difference in someones life and i think i had that opportunity tonight. 




well, a lot has happened today & i am worn out.
teacher cadet field experience starts tomorrow, so i'm going to bed! 
peace.

i've got my pride & she's got youuuuuu!

today was a good day!


i went & seen saw 3D, those movie always freak me out.
i'm so excited for this semester to be over with!
actually, i'm ready for this whole year to be over with!


I really wish i could find my kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Austin, because she's who inspired me to become a teacher & i want to tell her that. Maybe i'll make that my goal, to try & find her!


but i need to start on my homework!
peace!